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| Subject: | Sober |
| Time: | 2:33 pm. |
| Mood: |  content. | | Music: | the sound of happiness. |
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Wow, so I'm finally fuckin doing it.. I'm living the sober life. And in a weird way it feels good. I'll tell ya one thing... it sure is nice to have money in your pocket. Although $60 isn't alot of money but to still have more then half of it with the weekend almost over is just amazing for me. My parents and I are getting along now. I have a interview at Fort Lauderdale Airport next Wed. I'm very excited about that. I should within a month have an apartment with my boyfriend. His family has money like mine.. But he's got a little more money then my family. His dad is the president of the Fort Lauderdale Yacht Club. Ed and I went to dinner there and between the 2 of us our check came out to $347.62. It's fun living the rich life. Ha. I love it. I'm currently in the halfway house so I can save my money for a month and get the place Ed and I wanna get. Something small for now til we start banking which won't be long from now. I plan on having a car by the end of this year.. I was hoping my b-day but I'm not too sure on that. All I need to do is show my parents that I'm doing the things I need to do and bam, I get a car and help towards an apartment. Life is finally starting to look good and I'm finally at the state of contentment and happiness with someone. Life is good. Anyone wanna chat... 954 735 5107. I should have a cell by next week sometime. Well, I hope everyone else is ok... especially you Julie. I really wish that you could move on from all the bullshit. Start to enjoy life. Its not so bad. If you ever need to talk, please don't hesitate to call. Bye. ~IRis~ <3
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wow... i'm still alive... does noone go on lj anymore? ha. laterz
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Monday, December 4th, 2006
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| Time: | 11:40 am. |
| Mood: |  hopeful. | | Music: | MSI- Tight. |
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Wow, it's been quite some time for me as well being on livejournal. Anyways, I'm currently seeing someone and it's great not being broke. Let me tell you. I'm really happy right now. It's funny how Matt sits there and says he loves me and wants me back. Being with Stan pisses him off. Lol. I've been through alot in just a short amount of time. But things seem to be getting better now. I'm at FAU writing this. Stan's got a final and so I'm waiting for him to get out. I think we're going to go to South Beach this weekend and stay on the beach in a room. Hit up some clubs and shit. He treats me like I'm a fuckin queen. Better then anyone has ever treated me. He actually listens and understands me better then anyone. we've got like a $1000 right now but we're gonna save most of it because we're gonna get a place of our own. I'm going to be going to college soon and we're both gonna be working so things are definitely looking up for me; finally. :) I also hung out with Krystle. It was only for a couple hours but it was fun. I heard she chilled with Kevin and got in trouble. That sux. I won't go into details because it's not my business to tell. You know, sometimes it takes something really big to make you start over and better yourself. I'm starting over, from scratch. I don't have like anything to my name. I pretty much wear Stans' clothes for now until I can buy myself new ones. Well, I'm out guess I'm pretty tired of typing. Late ~Iris~ <3
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Wednesday, August 2nd, 2006
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Well, it sure has been awhile since Ive been on here. I'm over a Matt's house chillin. I got a job at Dunkin Donuts. Atleast it's money. Me and Matt are doing ok I guess. Things could be better. *Sighs* I miss all my old friends from high school. I think I'm going to contact them soon to chill. Well, gotta go for now. Kisses to those whom I dearly miss. ~Iris~<3
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Well, my parents have decided to let me come back home as long as I abide by their rules and get a job a.s.a.p. Also, I start probation on Thursday. Fun stuff. (Not) It's the 4th and I think I'm gonna chill with Julie, John, and Jerry. Things haven't been going so well between Matt and I. It seems that we're fighting alot and he went into my purse which is really fucked up. Anyways, I gotta run, he's standing behind me and might be reading what I'm writing. Love ya all!!!
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Well, Matt and I are living in a hotel on Commercial right now until we can str8en some shit out. I love him so much. He means everything to me. I got a cell phone finally and the number is 954 263 8906, So hit me up if you wanna chat and maybe come by to the hotel. Love ya all! <3 ~Iris~
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Tuesday, April 18th, 2006
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| Subject: | JAIL |
| Time: | 9:29 pm. |
| Mood: |  depressed. | | Music: | Alice in Chains-Down in a Hole. |
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I had the worst experience of my life yesterday. I was arrested for driving without a license, parofinelia, and having oc. My ankles were shackeled together like I was a rapist or something and my hands were handcuffed to a chain that wrapped around my body. Jail is the worst place in the world. I couldn't stop crying and I had no way of contacting anyone because everyone I tired to call had collect call blocked on their phones. It sucked. I got in a 2 a.m. and didn't get out until 3:30 p.m. They gave us gross bologna sandwhiches and the room was freezing cold. I never wanna go back. I have a court date coming up soon and since it's my first offence they might not be too hard on me. I have to have random drug tests and a bunch of other shit and if I fail to not do one thing told, I go str8 to jail. There was one toliet for about 10 girls in the cell with me and no privacy. Anyone and everyone could watch you. It was so horrible. I don't even wanna talk about it anymore. It just hurts too much. ~Iris~<3
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Wednesday, April 5th, 2006
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So my dad is having hip surgery tomorrow. Hopefully everything goes well. I'm going out with Krystle and Steve in a little bit. Token it up. And I'm supposed to chill with Michelle this weekend. I wonder what we'll wind up doing. Life has been ok I guess. Looking for a job and starting college in August. I might be moving to Davie in a few months with Matt. He gets out of the half way house May 1st. Yay! Man was he right about everyone I've dated. If only I would have listened. Anyways, I should be getting my license soon and I'll have pretty much my own car. Matt will let me drive. I think he's planning on getting a truck or something. Idk. I finally got my ring back thanks to Krystle. I figured Rachel didn't know it was my ring Julie gave to her. Tina's release on her apt. isn't getting renewed and she has nowhere to go. Her parents won't let her move in. That sux. I helped my friend Suzie move out of the hotel room the other day. It was so messy. Tina told me I'm such an awesome person because I always try to help people out as much as I can, which I guess is my major downfall as to why I get stepped on by people. Well, Steve and Krystle should be here soon so I'm out. Late!
~Iris~ <3
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Tuesday, March 21st, 2006
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| Subject: | Rings |
| Time: | 10:47 am. |
| Mood: |  aggravated. | | Music: | Slipknot-Fuck this world. |
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So, when ur ex has ur ring and gets a new girlfriend and gives her new girlfriend ur ring, that is just plain fucked up. I want MY fuckin ring back. Oh and then has the nerve to tell me she doesn't have it and wants to be friends but lies to me about it is also fucked up. You know, I tried being nice to u and ur girl and for u to give her my ring is so beyond fucked up just like u dedicated our song to Michelle. Just give me my ring back and I guess we can just go our own ways. I don't want problems, just the ring. Thanks!
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAUL!!!!!!!! GLAD WE GOT TO CHILL NOT TO LONG AGO. HOPEFULLY I'LL SEE YOU SOON. GIVE ME A CALL. YOU GOT MY NUMBER. BTW, TINA SAYS HAPPY B-DAY 2. LOVE YA AND STEPH. TAKE CARE.
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Thursday, February 9th, 2006
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After you die...
Guardian Angel
After death, you will exist as a guardian angel in order to protect your still-living loved ones. You might even inspire a classic Christmas movie.
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Take this quiz at QuizGalaxy.com
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Sunday, February 5th, 2006
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Hey guys... I still have my old aim sn which is metmotguns... but I have an aol account now too... my sn is rainbowqtpride. See you online. Love ya! ~Iris~
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Thursday, February 2nd, 2006
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Well, it's been quite some time since I last updated. Things were going good and then an unexpected turn events happened. Krystle and I made out a couple times and have been thinking of seriously dating. Last week Friday I was over my friends house when I started getting a severe pain in my back/side/stomach. So I went home and my parents thought it was food poisoning. So the next day I couldn't take the pain anymore so I went to the hospital and waiting for 5 and a half hours just to get into the back to be seen. Then waited 4 hours until I was all done. So together 9 and a half hours in a fuckin hospital. It fuckin sucked. So they x-rayed, hooked me up to an IV and gave me some pain medication. Then, the moment came where I found out what I had... A fuckin kidney stone... at 18. So, I can't drink anymore soda again... ALways water.. it sucks. They perscribed me oxycodone (perks 5) and it worked for a bit. Then yesterday my pain came back. My rents were at work so I had my nieghbor take me back to the hospital. My stone didn't pass. Again x-ray, IV, and morphine threw the IV. That shit was amazing. I had no pain within 10 minutes. It felt great. Then they gave me a cup to strain my piss in to catch the stone in and give it to my doctor. I can't go to work til next week which sucks because I need money. I'm losing so much weight because I've been throwing up because of the stone. I couldn't hold down water. My stomach is so weak that I can't eat alot. So this has been pretty much hell for me. And now one of my friends is moving back to Jersey. I'm gonna miss Kevin so much. He's a sweetheart. He said he's gonna miss his lesbian. Lol. Sometimes I think I should have stayed in Jersey. The people are so nice there and they actually care unlike here. I came back for someone I loved and for her to just leave me... so I played with her when I took her back the last time. Damn did she beg for me to go back to her.... lol. Anyways, I may not have alot of friends right now in my life but that's ok. It's better to make new ones and get rid of some of the old bad ones. I'll start college in August and hopefully have a car by then too. Well, that's it for now. Love ya! ~Iris~
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Sunday, January 8th, 2006
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Well, I went to Elements last night to see JD perform in the drama kings. She was awesome. Then her and I danced together. It was pretty intimate. I'm starting to talk to a girl named Nicole in Miami and I'm going to spend the night at her house this Friday night. She's a sweetheart. She's coming all the way from real south Miami all the way up here to come get me. I can't wait. Julie called me today and I was actually very surprised to hear from her. I'm glad I did though. It was good to hear from her. I'm glad things are going good for the both of us. Hopefully we can be friends. In other events, I was supposed to see Matt today but his mom said his dad was going. I haven't seen him in 3 weeks and that really upsets me. I miss him so much. Hopefully next week I'll see him. I'm going back to work finally tomorrow. I need the money. Thankfully I get paid this Wed. so I'll have money this weekend to take Nicole out to dinner. That is if she'll let me pay. Lol. Beth and Tina are not on talking terms and Tina wants me to try to talk to Beth and find out shit. I don't want to get involved i their problems. I hate being in the middle of drama. Other than that, I just can't wait for this weekend. Also, Nicole wants to take me to the Keys. That'll be fun. Well, that's it for now. Love ya guys!!!
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Thursday, January 5th, 2006
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Well, the new year has started and I'm done with it all... (drugs) I've been clean because of a couple of people. One person in paticular that I lost has changed my life. She woke me up and made me realize alot about myself and that made me change for the better. I have a job, getting an apartment soon, and starting college in the fall. I have a few of the old friends and making some new... better choices. I'm living back at home with my parents and things are going ok. They're still not too happy about the fact of me being a lesbian but in time I'm hoping they'll come around. Julie, if you do read this, please just give me the chance to talk to you and maybe you'll see that things in my life have changed. I'm not saying I wanna be with you or anything but I'm trying to let you know that I will always be here if you need someone to talk to anything about. Well, gonna go for now, got work tomorrow. Happy New Year to everyone and I hope things are going well like they are for me. Love ya.
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Monday, December 26th, 2005
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| Subject: | YOU |
| Time: | 1:46 am. |
| Mood: |  sad. | | Music: | Neo- so sick of love songs. |
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Gotta change my answering machine Now that im alone
Cuz right now it says that we
Cant come to the phone
And I know it makes no sence
Cuz you walked out the door
But its the only way i hear your voice anymore
(its ridiculous)
Its been months
And for some reason i just
(cant get over us)
And im stronger then this
(enough is enough)
No more walkin round
With my head down
Im so over being blue
Cryin over you
And im so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said im so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why cant i turn off the radio?
Gotta fix that calender i have
Thats marked "June 21st"
Because since theres no more you
Theres no more anniversary
Im so fed up with my thoughts of you
And your memory
And how every song reminds me
Of what used to be
Thats the reason im so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing you were still here
Said im so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why cant i turn off the radio?
(Leave me alone)
Leave me alone
(Stupid love songs)
Dont make me think about her smile
Or having my first child
Let it go
Turning off the radio
Cuz im so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing she was still here
Said im so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why cant i turn off the radio?
(why cant i turn off the radio?)
Said im so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishing she was still here
Said im so sick of love songs so sad and slow
So why cant i turn off the radio?
(why cant i turn off the radio?)
And im so sick of love songs
So tired of tears
So done with wishin you were still here
Said im so sick of love songs so sad and slow
Why cant i turn off the radio?
(why cant i turn off the radio?)
Why cant i turn off the radio?
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Sunday, December 25th, 2005
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Wow, what a weird day. I was alone most of it until Brandon and Steph came over around 11:30 and we went to get ciggerates and drove around for a bit. Then some crazy cab driver honked at us and cut us off, then slammed on his brakes and almost caused us to crash into him. So we took down the cab number and reported it to the police. Right as we did that a cop turned on his lights and went looking for him. It was so insane. Crazy mother fucker! Never trust yellow cabs, they suck. Anyways, other then that I had a really boring, depressing day. My parents don't want anything to do with me. I feel so unloved and hurt. I can't wait til Matt and I get this apartment so I can prove to them that I am resposible. Plus I have a job now too. And I'm going to school in August. I know college is going to be tough but I was told that if I try I can succeed. So, I know some people have faith in me and I thank them for still believing in me. I love those of you who do. Happy Holidays for those of you who enjoyed it, and for those who didn't, just letting you know your not alone. I cried most all today so I'm very drained from all the tears... night.
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Friday, December 23rd, 2005
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What the fuck? So someone I know says to someone I like that she can't be with me because I'm there ex. I'm sorry but you had me then lost me. I can be with who I wanna be with and so can they. And you were so upset that we were "all over each other" for what? You say you hate me and all this other bullshit, why do you care? Jealous? Probably.. that's what came to alot of people's minds. So if me and this other person are to date, it would be nice to support her considering she's your friend. So, in other news... Paul and his girl and I are on good talking terms and might possibley hang out. I'm seeing Matt this Sunday for Christmas... I'm so fuckin excited. I love to go and see him and tell him what goes on in my life. God was he right about someone I dated. I think I should listen to him more often. lol. So anyways, I'm gonna go..work.
Love 2 hate you!
~Iris~
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Sunday, December 18th, 2005
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I'm so excited because I get to see Matt today. I haven't seen him in months. He's been like a brother to me and is the ONLY one who truely understands me... I should have listened to him about the people I've dated. He was right about all of them... I'm seeing this girl now and I'm positive that he will like her... she's a sweetheart. My life has its ups and downs and right now things are looking up for me. I got a job, I'm seeing someone, and I get to see my best friend Matt. I can't wait to tell him the things that I have done in the past months since I last saw him. I hope that he is doing well. Well, off to sleep finally. Night.
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Saturday, December 17th, 2005
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Well, her and I are done again... big fuckin surprise. She came crying back to me because Michelle "her true love" hurt her again and I was there for her. She wanted me to go back to her but I didn't and so she went crawling back to Michelle... as usual. Now some of you may think I'm being harsh but I'm tired of being hurt by someone I love. I will always love you but you've hurt me for the last time. I won't EVER come back to you. I was there when she said you smell and have bad teeth or whatever... and I got kicked out of my house because of being a lesbian and not going with my family to Gainsville so I can see you because you were so hurt. Well, thanks for the good times we had and I guess this is goodbye. So long and have a great life of just getting hurt again... we all know it's going to happen. It's funny, I thought I was the best thing that had happened to you... but I guess I was just someone who you would have sex with and that's it. I don't really think you love me like you say you do because if you did, you would be with me... saying that you want to marry me and all... if you want to talk to me and try and talk things out fine... if not, that's fine too. Just know that you don't have me on a string and that I won't be coming back to you. Later.
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2loversforever's journal
high.
blah.
bouncy.
happy.
sick/in pain.
excited.
good.
drained.
accomplished.
ecstatic.
irritated.